Bear News Beartown News

February 1, 2011

Year to date statistics on Airport screening from the Department of Homeland Security

Terrorist Plots Discovered 0
 
Transvestites 133
 
Hernias 1,485
 
Hemorrhoid Cases 3,172
 
Enlarged Prostates 8,249
 
Breast Implants 59,350
 
Natural Blondes 3


  Price of gas in France 

A thief in  Paris  planned to steal some Paintings from the Louvre.

After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings, and made it safely to his van. However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied, 'Monsieur, that is the reason I stole the paintings.'
I had no Monet
To buy Degas
To make the Van Gogh.'
See if you have De Gaulle to send this on to someone else.

I sent it to you because I figured I had nothing Toulouse.

 

Ever wonder what radio station the bears and humans of BEARTOWN listen to while on the internet? Why good old Country Music, of course, on none other than: www.countrybear.com
Click here for genuine real country.
MISSION

The purpose of this paper is to report area news, and nothing but the news so help me God, unless I feel like doing something else, which I can do whether you like it or not because it is my paper. You can read it or not, just as you please. But remember, if you don't read an issue you don't know what your missing.

DID SOMEBODY SAY BEARTOWN
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